One of the challenges of being the youngest in my family is that I often check in with other people about what I’m doing in my life. When you’re the baby girl of nine siblings, you can’t just be doing stuff without making sure that your family is OK with it. While that was a great safety check as a child growing into my womanhood, I realize that needing another person’s approval has been a handicap for me moving into my full adulthood.
I can’t tell you how many times I have called one of my siblings or one of my close girlfriends to get a second, third, or even a fourth opinion about a choice I am considering in my life. It’s like I can’t turn left without asking someone “Is it OK?” “Do you think that will be alright?” “Do you think someone will get mad about XYZ?” One of my favorite life advisors, my girl, Adriane, typically ends most of our conversations as follows–“You’re gonna be fine, Leah. You know what you’re doing.”
I realize now that I’m ready to be present in my life without needing a co-signer. I’ve lived enough and had enough experiences of my own that I don’t need to look back and make sure that everyone is OK with what I’m up to. It’s no longer required for me to ask permission to live my life–I just have to do it.
At the end of the day, we really don’t need a co-signer. We just need to be the first partaker in our dreams, goals, and action plans. What does that look like? I don’t always know and sometimes I’m honestly afraid of what’s on the other side of my choices. But if I wait for someone else to sign off on my life, what will I be missing out on? What opportunities or people will pass me by if I’m not confident enough to stand up for my own YES and my own NO?
I won’t lie–it’s great to have people in my world to affirm what I’m doing. But it’s even more powerful to understand and know just how amazing I can be standing in my own God-given gifts and abilities with no co-signer required.